India vs Pak sex match between Indian guy and Pakistani girl
The Bone of Contention: An Indian Eyes-Only Porno of Pakistan’s Sweetest Spat
The night before the much-anticipated India vs Pakistan cricket match, the last thing expected on the covert Indian Military Intelligence radar was a tantalizing video that would have the country’s patriotic bros gyrating their “utiérrez” to a crash, clamor and boisterous playlist. But that’s just what it was – a titillating porn flick which whipped the nation into a rut-roarious rhapsody, with fans drooling over the raunchy sparring of an Indian stud and a Pakistani lass.
The video, a brainchild of a motley crew of patriotic pornographers, was shared exclusively within the expansive network of Indian military intelligence, and its contents have been a closely guarded state secret – until now.
The story begins with our dashing Indian hero, a strapping soldier of the Indian Armed Forces, hunkered down in the secret underground bunker, strategizing the next big offensive against the Pakistani army. His Pakistan counterpart, a curvaceous vixen from the ISI, the Pakistani spy agency, saunters in, her arms laden with classified documents.
“Fancy meeting you here,” she purrs, her dark eyes smoldering with desire.
“Is that so?” replies our bold Captain, raising an eyebrow. “And what brings such a beautiful spy to my den?”
The Pakistani girl daintily seats herself on his lap, her ripe lips curving into a sinful smile. “I’ve come to surrender,” she coos, unbuttoning her blouse with slim, manicured fingers.
Captivated by the intoxicating view of her ample cleavage, our Captain groans in acquiesce. “I guess I have no choice but to accept your surrender, Agent,” he rasps, cupping her generous breasts with calloused paws.
The two begin to make out with the gusto of a century-old rivalry, their hands groping and fondling each other wildly. The Pakistani girl’s tomboyish shorts are ripped from her body, and she’s revealed to be sans underwear – a fact that sends the poor Captain into a fit of patriotic pant-spooging.
“Excellent!” he exclaims in his best RRR (Rajinikanth, Rana Daggubati, Ram Charan) drawl. “This means we can get right to the cum-n-fusion!”
Grabbing the randy vixen by her love handles, he flips her over onto her desk, where she lays all spread-like-a – “gonewhenitsdone” eagle. Her face presses into the pile of hush-hush documents, giving the impression that she’s giving them the ol’ “taps-and-tantras” even while she slobbers onto the table in anticipation.
Our macho Captain wastes no time. His fatigues are yanked down his muscular thighs and his big, thick bat clobbers her tight little wicket, sliding in with ease thanks to the copious amounts of honey-dripping moonlight glistening on those silky, garam-bharam folds.
“Ohhh! Yaaar! Chhad铆so kya?’ (Oh! Yes! Stop-that feels nice!)” Chhok tod the Pakistani girl, jibber-jabbering in her native Urdu even as her/assets are being batted by a floppy-dicky blade of desh-bhakti.
“Playa, don’t waste a single drop, baby! Every drop counts!” commands Captain Mustachioed-Majunction, gritting his teeth and squeezing out every last drop.
It was a battle that raged long into the night, with the occasional clash of titans (boobs, to be precise) and the rumble of armageddon-battering thighs – all captured in high-definition Blu-ray for an enthusiastic audience of eager Haryanvis.
The Pakistani girl’s battle cries grew louder, interspersed with a medley of “Arey wah! Akshay Kumar! Tell me more obsessed things!” and “Porcelain Rommel! Hurry, hurry! Kidney pressure high gayi!” before she marched to attention for the “surrender pleaded to duty.” The Indian soldier shone victorious, emerging triumphant with a single salty tear of soldierly satisfaction dangling from his proud, patriotic penis.
The video ended with an epilogue, revealing that the footage appeared to be a real-life recording, and that the military folk were only using their gradated lexicons andвојuskский fictional personas to disguise the identities of the spies. It concluded with a salacious and sly victory sign from the Pakistan girl, now sprawled shaggily between a patriotic number of flag-waving captains – a just desserts for the “stall tactics” her handlers had employed at the 2016 Laureus World Sports Awards.
And there you have it – an unauthorized peek into the secretly explicit lives of our secret agents. By the end of the match, it had made the rounds of every single military-grade, jam-fed Android device – a digital forehead slap that captured the imagination of the surging soldier state.
In the end, it was a win-win for Team India, who got to revel in their dirty little secret while still claiming a hollow moral high ground, and for the nation, who could hardly believe their luck – their jingoism had finally found a new target. A new meme, a new height of tongue-in-cheek one-upping. But mostly, it marked the beginning of a new era in the “war of the dicks.”
The question is: who will win the next battle? By all accounts, our beloved Captain has a serious score to settle, not to mention a serious case of lumbago – courtesy of that bone-breaking hook shot that’s been haunting his dreams for days. But will he be able to score a repeat performance? Or will the Pakistani girl play her own secret ace? Let’s just say, there are plenty of spies where the came from, and no shortage of little green men to help make sweet, loving trillion-dollar deals…