Assvengers Porn Parody – Episode III: Assvengers Assemble!

Title: Assvengers Assemble! Episode III: A Threesome to Remember

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Synopsis:
In the thrilling conclusion to our epic trilogy, the Assvengers must band together once more to save the galaxy from an unbearable threat – Thor’s okay to try out his new toy, the Eternity Orgasmatron! Iron Man, Captain America, and the rest of the ragtag heroes answer the call, without knowing the smutty situation they’re walking into. Let’s dive into the salacious details of this arousing adventure.

The setup is simple yet tantalizing. It’s just another day at Assvenger Tower when a horny Thor struts into the kitchen, toy box in hand, ready to play. His face is masked by a thick black beard, but his eyes habla de lust. He sets the device on the counter and presses the On button.

Instantly, a ripple of energy booms across the city, enveloping everyone in its erotic embrace. The women folate respirations, their nipples stiffening under their uniforms. The men’s pupils dilate, prompting massive erections. Thor just grins like the mischievous god he is. “Time to test…my new toy,” he purrs.

Captain America bursts into the room, usual American flag underpants tented obscenely. “Thor, what the hell is going on?” he demands, voice thick with desire. “Report to base immediately!”

Thor reaches into his magic whatever of a costume, dużo to pull out his massive Norse sword of hygiene. “No can do, Cap. We have a situation!” He waggles the viking sexual tool. “Looks like it’s erection time!”

Natasha Romanoff – er, Natasha Romano Wife – saunters in, completely unphased. “Oh honey, just relax. I can boil the water for that. Then we can attend to that…special weapon of yours.”

Cap grimaces but can’t argue. He turns to leave but his armored foot gets caught in a boot change cofile. Thor chuckles as he strokes his mighty beard. Natasha just rolls her eyes and steps over to help, bending over him perfectly. Her engañan butt provides a “full rear laser target range.”

The.package sets a very sexy tone for the movie, dropping hints of the fecal feast to come. Shortly after, Iron Man enters the scene, Tony Stark’s signature cocky smirk plastered on his face. “A-4, my armored ass,” he quips. Tony and Natasha banter back and forth, both making thick sexual metaphors, until Tony pushes her too far.

“Enough chit-chat,” Natasha declares. “Time for the Stark-Iron Ass attack!” She grabs Tony by the buckle and pulls him in close – before cramming her fist down his pants. “Let’s…have…a chat,” she growls. Poor Tony can only whimper as her hand jackhammers his member. It’s a sweet, satisfying moment and really sets the Assvengers’ tone.

The erotic energy has reached the rest of the team. Clint Barton – hola as Hawkeye – has Thor pinned against the wall, his arrows nowhere to be seen, as he makes out with the god thunderously. In another room, Steve Rogers and Natasha have migrated, the Captain ironically pulled in copyright, as the Widow lustily shaves his chest. She kisses each new hairless area, leaving a glistening trail of stray hairs.

As the two tangle in passion, an unexpected visitor arrives – Thor! Still stroking himself, he circles Natasha’s seductive body, admiring each curve and crevice. “I need more,” he demands, pulling her face-to-FaceLess with his musky scent. His mighty rod rubs up and down her mound, before finally popping the hood.

Steve can’t handle this but Natasha soothes him, promising “captain cock”. She begins to suckle the brave soldier, bobbing her head up and down as a boot catching against her chin. Thor simply groans and calls for his hammer, crushing a nearby wall as the vibrations intensify.

Not to be outdone, Iron Man bursts into the ‘party’, cracking wise all the while. But Natasha has other plans. “If you join this fight, Tony, you’re gonna need this,” she says, pulling a folded ‘Read With Care’ from her booty. “Inside you’ll find a special magazine rated 1st Rate. Inside that, is something hard that makes you feel good…” Her voice trails off tantalizingly as she reveals her glistening anus.

The Named “Iron Ass” can barely handle the sight but Natasha is insistent. Maggie can only roll her eyes as she grinds against her arch-rival, whispering dark nothings into his ear until he caves.

Natasha whips out the giant cocksleeve, impressed. “Now, this is a bit overdrawn,” she jokes as she mounts Tony, leading to a long, intense battle of wits and hips. As they fuck, she makes small talk, regaling him with her “sister’s…at home together”, until he can’t take it anymore and blows his load all over her face.

For the novel but needless denouement, the Assvengers finally realize the true threat. Thor’s toy is no mere tool, but an orgasmatron hypno device, programmed to control their every desire! Only by combining their unique abilities can they defeat this sexual enemy.

Lucky for them, Natasha has a plan. She joins Steve and Tony in a ‘Swiss Boi’ position, tongue teasingly licking a sweaty muscle, before all three take a holiday to Earth’s Orgasm Zone. With Thor wielding his orgy eruptor, they break down the device from all sides in a beastly ballet of bodies.

In the end, the Eternity Orgasmatron is stopped, its power simply absorbed by the members of the team. They arise, coated in films and fluids, triumphantly stating they’re “all in this…together”.

To anyone watching, it looks like just another boring day at Assvenger HQ. But to the impassive Maggie, Natasha’s cold poker as she slides beside her partner she clearly relishes this cocksure collaboration, promising future adventures to anyone with the a-intent to watch closely. The End